Ravings · of · a · Mad · Historian

At the risk of offending someone, I will note that I didn't actually beleive, as I said an earlier post, that Turkey could ever fight on the side of Islamic extremism. In fact, I beleive that they will be dead-set against it, considering the fact that they are a nation devoted to secularism in the extreme.
Still, Turkey's secularism is something that has always disturbed me. First and foremost, it's French, and, despite the opinions of certain people very dear to me I still don't particular like the brilliant Revolutionary ideals.
Back to the point, I think that Turkey's secularism may result in it's not wanting to become entangled in a war based on religion. If, for Israel, it is a war for national (and, to an extent, religious survival) and for everyone else it is seen in much the same manner, will Tureky avoid involvment?
They may be the Turkish Army, but they're big, they are prone to government change, and, of course, they really, really want to join Europe.
Horrido!!!
TS Allen

Those who know me know that I think Gavin Menzies and his book '1421: The Year the Chinese Discovered America' are ridiculous, but it's also riddled with minor mistakes. So as I read through it, I'll point out the little things which just shoot holes in his theory. Small posts to the blog when I find them, but some just glare out of the page.

I'd like to say first though, Gavin Menzies used to command a Royal Navy submarine. And I respect any submariner. I don't claim him to be a liar or a cheat, I simply believe he has made some honest mistakes. And they're funny to read....

Gavin Menzies slip-up Number One: He claims on page 102 of his book:

'The diaries of Ma Huan also give a vivid picture of south-east Asia - the crocodiles that inhabit the mangrove swamps, rubber being tapped, the tin mines and the coconut plantations'

Okay, nothing seems wrong. Rubber is found in MODERN south-east Asia. But it was only with some great difficulty that it was introduced in the nineteenth century to the area, it was only native to South America. The fact is indisputable, any journal which describes rubber being harvested in south-eastern Asia in 1421 is a fake. Menzies, I will note, does not quote any part of the journal which mentions rubber harvesting, so I will give Menzies the benefit of the doubt for now.

I'll try to email the 1421 Project about this, they were quite helpful when I was doing some Frisland research a while back as to getting there opinion on the literal locations of several landmasses in the northern Atlantic. They take quite a while to respond, though, but I'll post the emails here.

Philosophy of Gaming Blog

A friend, Alex Kramer, has got some interesting ideas up on his gaming blog. I've not go much interest in philosophy, but I do like playing with toy soldiers (er, sorry, wargaming) so I am linking to it.

Speaking of gaming, I am working on a medieval military simulation. It is basically a set of formulas you can use to calculate the output for military purposes of a village or town.

I am also adding a political element to the game, with certain formulas from other people's work being tweaked by me to allow you to calculate a villages market area and such. Of course, since this is for gaming, while I am working on 'realistic' calculations for sizes of armies and interaction between areas (there's a formula for it!!!) I am exagerrating things like Natural Increase Rate (N.I.R.) and just making up ship tonnage allowances because of how much this varies.

One great resource is Wikipedia, actually. I do edit it, but don't use it much for information, I go the the library for that sort of thing. The problem is that you just can't easily find medieval population statistics easily in this period. Luckily, throught diligent searching I have found nearly all of what I need on the internet.

The only thing I really need to work out is what the era is I am working from (exactly, I am generally working from 1300-1450)and the exact geographic limits (probably Central Europe and England, for now, but I will only use a few, unified nations for which statistics are generally available) which I will limit my data-collecting to.

Horrido!!!

TS Allen

Well, lately I have developed an odd habit. Lecturing myself on Waterloo (and Ligny, and Wavre, and Quatre Bras...). All day.

Of course, this has required quite a bit of explaining. People I see regularly look at me now as if I am insane, of course, a quick explanation will usually suffice to prove my mental soundness.

But of course, in some cases no matter how logical and detailed that explanation is, it will still not prove your point. Case and point, everyone I see regularly now thinks I am insane. Contradictory to my previous paragraph, yes, but I am bonkers, aren't I?

Of course, there are certain persons who I don't wish to think I am crazy. People I like (Okay, people I can stand to be around). And I do think that it is hurting my reputation.

And the fact that once I get started I can't seem to stop myself (only a few people, and even fewer people not recently deceased, can). And when you try to hold a conversation with both yourself and someone else, the result is, er, confusing.

TS Allen

Yesterday I was on the very nice site landships.freeservers.com, which I must say is probably one of the better WWI general information sites on the web, and I came across the picture below.

It is, apparently, First World War Austrian snow camouflage in a European museum. I don't doubt the authenticity of the item, but I do wonder if it had any influence on the design on the Alpenkorps windjacke mentioned in the last post.

But, that reminded me that, supposedly, my Windjacke was originally a 'private-purchase' item for officers. Personally, I think that the seller rather dubiously wished to label it as a desirable, rare, officer's item rather than something from a small, obscure unit, fighting in the Alps. Sound logic.

The problem is that these 'private-purchase' items seem to be standard issue. Upon finding the tunic I did find for sale on the internet several photos showing large groups of men wearing these windjackes, but sadly I could not purchase them because the seller had a short temper with international money transfers. Still, the evidence exists for these being common and apparently identical.

My windjacke bears, not a tailors mark, but a scratched-out label followed by the label 'Elbersfeld' and the date 1918. I am not familiar with an Elbersfeld Arsenal and doubt it is a last name, but it must mean something. It could be a name, which would explain that the tunic was re-issued and the initial owners name scratched out, but why a date? I've not yet handled more than a few German tunics of the Great War, but I am quite sure that some have names and none, if any, show date marks.

My conclusion is that this item must not be German, it must be either field made or Austrian. Of course, it looks (to me at least) nothing like the cape shown below. So that says 'Not Austrian'. Also, the fact the collar has a 'German' shape similar to the collar of a Waffenrock and a similar cut to an M1915 field tunic (I beleive it to be of identical cut, in fact) would not lend itself to the idea of this being Austrian made. The possibility of this being made by the Alpenkorps in the field cannot be ruled out. They spent an extensive initial training period in the Alps before ever seeing service, and could have found the time to make them. Indeed, units of the era were most well equipped and resourceful when it came to the manufacture of simple fighting implements or uniform items, the first steel helmet, that of German Army Group 'Gaede' was field made from picklehauben skull caps and steel plates and most trench clubs were made in field factories. But, one cannot rule out the possibility of it being a German tunic.

I intend to consult a few people and provide a final answer to the origin of my tunic. I don't know exactly were to start, but considering this tunic is not often seen, I wouldn't mind doing some in-depth research into the history of the Alpenkorps and of course, their uniforms.

One final note. If I do discover this tunic was issued to someone named 'Elbersfeld' in 1918, I do know that I may be able to identify the tunic. I know that the man was an NCO because there are holes in the collar were rank disks were once affixed. This alone is interesting, as it shows that this uniform was camouflage as it lacks the collar litzen normally worn by senior NCOs (it could be a corporals unit, I embarassingly admit I am not aware as to what type of litzen if any was worn by them).

TS Allen

Been assembling a complete Order Of Battle for it. Here's what I have so far:

Regular Artillery:
Preußen Field artillery 203 and 204
Preußen Foot artillery batteries 101 and 102

Gebirgs Artillerie:
Bavarian Gebirgs-Artillerie-Abteilung 2
Preußen Gebirgs-Kanonen-Abteilung 1 and 2
Preußen Gebirgs-Minenwerfer-Abteilung 269 to 272

Mashcinegewehr:
Preußen Reserve-Maschinegewehr-Abteilung 4
Gebirgs Maschinegewehr:
Preußen Gebirgs-Maschinegewehr-Abteilung 201 to 210

Pioneer:
Preußen Pioneer companies 101

Gebirgs Pioneer:
(Read somewhere at leat one of these units existed, but lost the reference.)

Cavalry:
Preußen 3rd Squadron of the 4th Cheveauleger Regiment

Gebirgs Cavalry:
(none, I doubt they exist)

Infantrie:
Bavarian Infanterie-Leib-Regiment 1, 2 and 3
Preußen Gebirgs-Fernsprech-Abteilung 29 Funker-Kommando 12
Bavarian Schneeschuh-Btl.1, 4 and Prussian Schneeschuh-Btl.2, 3

Jager:
Bavarian Jäger-Brigade 1, 2 and Jäger-Regiment 1, 2, 3
Bavarian Jäger-Bataillon 1, 2, 10
Bavarian Reserve-Jäger-Bataillon 2, 10, 14

Fleiger:
Preußen Feld-Flieg. Abteilung 9

The Alpenkorps was reinforced with other units during 1915 (mistype?) including artillery, pioneers, Jägers and cyclists.

Half of this is directly copied from something posted on the website of the gentlemen I purchased my WWI Windjacke from. The other half is stuff I have dug up.

Now, I think that the Pioneers added held the 'Gebirgs' designation, but don't know. Any help at completing this OOB would be appreciated.

The photo is of my Alpenkorps Windjacke. I bought this thing at a steal from a very nice gentlemen in Belgium last year, and it now rests on one of my main display mannequins.

TS Allen

In 1912, Turkey reached it's hand out to England, hoping to join the unified European alliance forming about the Entente Cordiale.

Turkey was at a world flashpoint: Sharing a border with Serbia.

And WWI started in Serbia.

With Turkey fighting against Britian.

Today Turkey reaches it's had out to Europe, hoping to join the European Union. It is a European power, with the second-largest army in NATO.

Turkey is at a world flashpoint: It shares a border with Iraq and many other Middle Eastern nations.

Will WWIII start in the Middle East?

Will Turkey fight against Islamic Extremism, or for it?

The answer is against, but if they don't fight, we are in a bad situation.

Winston Spencer Churchill was the man at the British Colonial office who ignored Turkey. He got away with this bungle by making sure everyone forgot Turkey would have been an ally in the Great War, and not the enemy he would fail trying to conquer from the sea.

But, with Turkey so vocal about joining the EU, will the next mistake be so rapidly forgotten by the laymen of the world? Or will the EU's leaders be criticized, throughout the future, for perpetrating, 95 years after the first event, a mistake which is known to history.

Horrido!!!

TS Allen

Dunkirk, the last holdout of the British Expeditionary force during the 1940 Campaign for France, was surrounded by the allies in late 1944 and cut off. The Germans held Dunkirk until VE Day.

Even today, many historians are not familiar with ‘Second Dunkirk’ because it was tactically insignificant. There is some argument among militaria collectors over the issue of a campaign shield manufactured in the city during the war. No photographic evidence shows it was worn, but several originals are known to exist.

Strange though, that two groups which share similiar language, heritage, race, and a hatred of Hitler (well, now at least) would have fought each other so much. To bad Mon's wasn't as interesting, I love talking about the famous Angels which allegedly saved the Brits.

TS Allen

On the future-
“A former Russian Nuclear Missile is like an appendix, it isn’t that important until it blows up.”

On Alexanders wish to attack Afghanistan-
“Afghanistan is a prison of Nations, although many large groups check in, few large groups check out.”

On Athens and Rule of the people-
“If pro is the opposite of con, then is congress the opposite of progress?’

The following is a translation of the earliest known works of Plutarchimedes, the great thinker, and is dated by himself as 1,500 B.C., and was concealed by him with a coin of a similar dated for purposes of authentication. It was discovered, along with other documents, by a subaltern of Her Majesties 60th Rifles, while on service in the Crimea, and is original written in a modern English, as Plutarch had at one time lived in that nation. The translator and publisher, BS Allen (at Number & Upper Street, London, England) hopes to bring further documents from this author in the future into the public light.

While looking for quotes to take credit for, I invented and/ or ‘borrowed’ the term Wikinonymous. Seriously, as far as I know I can take this one as my invention. And, even if I didn’t technically invent this I am writing this at least 3000 years before the advent of the internet, and back then you actually had to walk outside to check your address rather than Goggle Earth(ing) it. Now, as we all now, Wikipedia is an amalgamation of two words: Wicked and Pedophilia, so is a Wikinonymous person a pedophile who is never caught?

Or, is it just one of the Ancient Greeks? Now, think about it, not only did whey invent the word anonymous, we also we pretty much all pedophiles. I wasn’t, (and nor was I gay, which may shock my fellow Athenians, but seriously, I needed to write a lot of this crap) and the Athenian SVU, who were [Translators/ Bloggers note: Microsoft spell check told me to change that ‘were’ to ‘was’, which I think officially makes them borderline retarded, which is now full blown mental deficiency when my brand new PC doesn’t read ‘Bloggers’] reminiscent of the Persian Gestapo, arrested me and hurt my left arm. Anyway, back on topic, they were offended if we weren’t, so I guess it is time to admit that Greek Wikipedia really has a lot of lazy authors if English Wikipedia is bigger. Oh well, we already have done most of our best work, time to be like Harper Lee and do nothing for a few decades/ centuries/ millennia/ epochs/ infinites.

Translated by Mr. BS Allen, Printer, 1893.

The whole nation is out of the news recently, but it is still the site of a war.

While the entirety of the British Army was incapable of taking and then leaving Afghanistan, a German, and Scot claiming to be an American succeeded in not only crossing the whole place but also then walking strait to Europe. All the while the German was not only an infidel but also a priest actively trying to convert the natives. The German, one Doctor Joseph Wolff, was an argumentative fellow who wandered most of Eurasia over his lifetime.

Actually, he wasn’t the last German to enter the area. Oskar von Neidermayer set out in 1915 in order to convince the Emir of Afghanistan, Emir Habibullah, to attach British India. The idiots marched through Persia, and eventually reached Kabul. Oskar von Hentig, the diplomatic element of the expedition, failed to make any headway with prompting an Invasion. In 1919, there was an Anglo-Afghan War, a large one which is today largely overlooked because of how it was overshadowed by WWI, but I digress as I intend to cover something remotely humorous here.

Now, I intend to further digress. There were, I believe, some Sikh’s who had been captured by the Germans on the expedition. To me, I think of the infamous Azad Hind legion when I think of Indians in German service. In WWII, Rommel captured a few battalions of Indian troops in North Africa, and eventually some were captured and brought into German service. Now, I didn’t know that the Germans captured many Indians in WWI. Usage of Indian troops was always limited on the Western Front, and of course the numbers were reduced as the war dragged on. I doubt they were using the troops captured at Tanga Bay, but of course maybe the LZ 49 met them halfway to Germany at Khartoum? I guess the Germans had a very easy time finding recruits during this relatively early era of Indian nationalism, which surprises me but of course I can’t find exact figures yet.

On last ramble, why did the British not use more Indians in WWI? In WWII, they actually had to rely on Indians defending India. After the Battle of Imphal they could afford to do with fewer men, but of course they didn’t use more Indians in Europe. I understand the Pacific campaign was a long, drawn out affair, which truly explains further why usage of Indians in Europe in WWII was limited. Still, it seems as if Great Britain feared something major occurring in India. A revolt, maybe, but Indians had been deployed in large numbers before. Oh well, I’ll just have to research it.

I am TS Allen, the Mad Historian.

I shall rant and rave endlessly, and argue to no end.

I can speak no Greek at all, yet have translated the complete works of Plutarchimedes.

I hope to update this blog daily, as I have that much time on my hands.

WARNING: Much of what I write on this blog is historical satire. While I also write many historical articles, if I sign the end of something 'B.S. Allen' rather than 'T.S. Allen' than it is BULLSHIT.

T.S. Allen